The
Right
to Stay
Dirk Willem te Selle, Enschede, NL
March 2005
In
the "Achterhoek" and also in the region "Twente" in
the eastern part of The Netherlands it was the most ordinary
matter in the world. The eldest son, because it generally is he
who continues the farming business of his parents, gets more than
his brothers or sisters at the partitioning of the parental
property. The other siblings must be content with considerably
less than an equally proportional share. And they accept that
arrangement naturally, because the family agrees completely that
the successor can best continue the existence of the agricultural
business as a whole. There is even a nice Dutch term for this: the
"blijversrecht" or "right to stay" (literally, "the
stayer's right"). However, the eldest son does not get this
bonus for free. In exchange for the over-allocation of
property, the successor son must look after the parents until
their death. Moreover, frequently he is obligated to provide
unmarried brothers and sisters a "hoeskommen" or
"homecoming place" until they are about thirty years of age.
Sometimes he even has to provide them a trousseau when they get
married.
This remarkable tradition in local culture is so typical for the
Achterhoek region that many people are not aware that it is
actually contrary to Dutch law. Not that the Achterhoek
people care much about that! In their opinion regular Dutch
law is much too businesslike and offers insufficient guarantees
for the continued existence of the parental farm. According
to some research workers "the right to stay" tradition is an
elaboration of a centuries-old Achterhoek practice, which
was once dictated to the many serfs by feudal law, but now is
cherished as a philosophy of life.
The agreements concerning parental fortune and
future parental inheritance were generally put on paper, signed by
the parents, and were often also endorsed by the brothers and
sisters. Not only was the concept illegal, but the
agreements were formalized as well! Even though the document
was authenticated in the Achterhoek by an official notary,
this endorsement and the agreement terms, which were described in
a "pre-contract", "moral agreement", or a "family agreement", are
contrary to the Dutch law. Such an agreement is, in
principle, even null and void!
In any event, this Achterhoek common law
tradition, the wish of farmer families to keep the parental
farmstead intact in the hands of the family, did enable many
farmsteads to survive. Elements of this "right to stay"
concept we can find in the memorabilia of the family Te Selle.
A family contract was executed on the 20th of March 1855,
following the occasion of the marriage on the 15th of March 1855
of Derk Willem te Selle (1827-1904) and Janna Berendiena Weerkamp
(1822-1877) . Father Jan Albert te Selle (1800-1845) had already
died at an age of 45 years while the family was still living at
the farm "De Selle". In 1855, ten years after his death his
widow Dela ten Damme (1802-1883) signs the family contract to sell
the movables of the farm to their oldest son Derk and
daughter-in-law Janna. They will continue the farming. The
amount is not stated in the contract, but it is clear that there
is no more future on "De Selle" for the other brothers. Even
though mother Dela still has the movables under her control for
ten more years, afterwards she has to hand over everything to the
oldest son Derk and his wife. Uncle Jan Hendrik te Selle,
living at farmstead "Meekes" in the Winterswijk hamlet Brinkheurne,
signs his name also to the contract as a witness.
Even if the six other sons did receive some money, the amount
would not have been large. In 1861, six years after the
marriage, the family had to move to farm "Fökkink". Four
years later in 1865 the complete movables were handed to Derk
Willem and his wife and the purchase price must have been paid.
Perhaps then mother Dela had sufficient money to give some initial
capital to her sons Jan Hendrik, Harmen Jan and later Gerrit Jan
for their emigration to America.
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